Last night, a re-run of the episode of “The Nanny” with Bette Midler was on, a joyous reminder of what Fran Drescher used to be. A woman with enough comedic sense to call someone a pisher. This episode had about 20% more Jew than other episodes of “The Nanny.” There was noticeably more yiddish in scenes with Bette Midler than without. Imagine if Fran actually had Barbara Streisand on.
If you watch Fran’s new show, “Happily Divorced,” Fran loses her Jewiness, as I’ve said. If it takes Bette Midler to transform Fran into “The Nanny” again, by all means, TV Land should make the call to the Divine Miss M.
Roseanne Barr’s new reality show “Roseanne’s Nuts” is an honest little show with a big center piece. Roseanne is explosive and funny, just as someone would expect from the creator of one of TV’s best sitcoms. In the first couple of episodes, Roseanne takes the audience on a tour of her Macadamia nut farm in Hawaii. The show is in the familiar reality show format, but Roseanne is not afraid to tell the cameras to leave. When she is upset, she orders them out of her house.
These two women are also famous political wannabes. When Hillary Clinton became Secretary of State, Drescher considered a run for U.S. Senate. Right now, she is a U.S. diplomat–sort of. Officially, her title is Public Diplomacy Envoy for Women’s Health Issues. Meanwhile, Roseanne Bahr is running for President of the United States and The Prime Minister of Israel. She calls it “a toofer.”
This is a fight for the White House I want to see: Barr-Drescher vs. Palin-Bachmann, the Jewess ticket vs. the shiksa ticket, “Funny Girl” vs. “Sweet Charity.” It would be the best race since Stewart-Colbert vs. O’Reily-Beck. Plus, if anyone could straighten out the Israeli Parliament, it’s Roseanne.
Imagine the White House at Christmas time: “Tonight Katie Couric goes inside the White House to see the world’s largest Hannukah bush.” Imagine the committee meetings: “Vice President Drescher began the meeting with a spread of lox and bagels for Speaker of the House John Boehner and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi.”
Best of all, imagine the tax benefits. “President Barr signed a bill today declaring no sales tax on items under $100. Vice President Drescher could not be reached for a comment because she is at Loheman’s.”
Perhaps these two ladies could turn not one but two countries around. It’s a one-time deal.
