| Guide to the Perplexing |
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| Written by New Voices | |||||
| Tuesday, 23 November 2004 | |||||
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Hog Heaven, Kosher Poker, Tribe TV  Hogs In Ha Aretz Porcine Prominence in the Promised Land Israel has always touted its glowing record of tolerance toward minority groups. But historically, the holy land has been profoundly intolerant of one fundamental element of its society: the pig. Yep, Israel has always turned the cold shoulder on its porcine population – until now. Raising pigs has been illegal in Israel since 1963, when the Knesset banned it as a concession to the Orthodox, who consider a moratorium on swine crucial to maintaining the country’s Jewish character. All that changed this June, when the Israeli High Court overturned the pig-farming ban – though it did recommend that shopkeepers in ultra-Orthodox neighborhoods be sensitive and relegate their boars to the back room. The secularist Shinui Party went hog-wild with celebration, while the religious right felt a bit skewered: “The High Court has driven a central nail in the coffin of Jewish identity in the state,” Eli Yishai, head of the conservative Shas Party, told Global News Wire. But even before June’s court decision, Israel has had a burgeoning bacon business, one center of which is Kibbutz Mizra, the Jezreel Valley home of one of the largest pork-processing plants in the region. According to Ha’Aretz, Mizra produces 150 tons of pork every month. “We own and operate the most advanced slaughterhouse in the Middle East,” claims the kibbutz’s web site, boasting a roster of meat products that includes nine varieties of pork alone. With pigs the pariahs that they are, where does Mizra get its merchandise? One source is Kibbutz Lahav, which raised pigs legally for years using the single loophole in Israel’s anti-porcine provision: pigs could be raised for “research purposes,” and any surplus swine could then be slaughtered. Speaking of loopholes, though New Voices was unable to corroborate this claim, the Rough Guide to Israel and the Palestinian Territories reports that at the desert kibbutz, swine are kept on wooden floors round the clock, so as not to contaminate the soil of the holy land. As of late, Israel is using pigs for more than their succulent flesh. On a 2003 trip to Croatia, Geva Zin – a veteran of an IDF dog-training unit – observed the zeal with which wild boars sought out truffles. That triggered a brainwave that pigs could be used to sniff for bombs, and for over a year now he has been training porkers to detect explosives with their schnozzes. Soon, he believes, pigs will outpace dogs as the premier bomb-sniffing animal. “Look at their snouts,” he told the Post. “This animal was made for this mission.” Eventually, Zin hopes that mine-sniffing pigs can be employed to de-mine former war zones such as Angola and Mozambique. The Israelis also plan to employ the security swine in their own backyard – or at least in their settlements. Given pigs’ rising stock, even the ultra-Orthodox are coming around. Rabbi Daniel Shilo, chairman of the West Bank’s rabbinical committee, ruled that the raising of pigs was permissible for the purpose of defense, as did Kiryat Arba’s chief rabbi. Yekutiel Ben-Ya’akov, director of a company that supplies settlements with guard dogs, enthused about the prospect of being protected by porkers, observing to the Post that “Pigs have superior sniffers to dogs.” This certainly represents porcine progress. It remains to be seen, though, whether Israelis will truly welcome pigs into the fold, or succumb to their rasher instincts. - Miriam Felton-Dansky High Rollers in the Low Lands Las Vegas Gin and Jews Stop us if you’ve heard this one before: two Jewish gangsters, a fleet of go-go dancers, and some neon light engineers walk into a bar. Only it’s 1945, the bar is in the Nevada badlands, and infamous Jewish tough Benjamin “Bugsy” Siegel has rolled into the abandoned desert town with a burning bush-scale vision: Las Vegas – a land of milk, honey, and racketeering. Within three years Siegel had built the Flamingo Hotel casino on crime syndicate money, defined the Sin City paradigm – excess is success – and gotten himself shot for skimming profits. It was the birth of Las Vegas: desert dust to Stardust, a Jewish mobster’s dream. Sixty years later, Siegel’s legacy is alive and well. Jewish organized crime, this time hailing from Israel, is currently sinking its teeth into the city of sin. Two prominent crime families – one known to authorities as the “Jerusalem Network”-- have already cornered Vegas’ booming ecstasy market. They also dabble in extortion, prostitution, and money laundering. But mobsters are not the only Jews wandering this desert town: Las Vegas boasts the fastest-growing Jewish community in North America. According to a population study by the Jewish Federation of Las Vegas, around 600 Jews arrive in the area each month. Casinos cater to the kosher set, golf courses swell at the seams with retirees who thumbed their noses at Florida, and the Vegas Kosher Chinese restaurant “Shalom Hunan” will be booked solid this Christmas Eve. By all local estimates, Las Vegas Jews are eager to mingle. In support of this enthusiasm, the Federation has brewed up some choice diversions: last Hanukkah they threw a “Vodka Latkes” party at OPM, Wolfgang Puck’s French-Asian fusion feng shui-themed nightclub. An ideal place to enjoy Hanukkah Martinis: rum, brandy, eggnog, and butterscotch schnapps – Moses channeled through Bacchus. The party was a wild success, topped only by the Tenth Annual Bagel Ball, where attendees were invited to “dance and schmooze” on Christmas Day. While there were no bagels at the ball, there was a semi-formal dress code, and guests were required to prove they were of age – after all, Adam Sandler songs were to be played. But despite all this partying, only a fraction of the Las Vegas Jewish population is affiliated with a synagogue. “I have been here for 17 years,” says Rabbi Sanford Akselrad of Las Vegas Congregation Ner Tamid, “and there are two truths. It’s true that the Jewish community is growing by leaps and bounds, and there are more synagogues, but it’s also true that affiliation is pretty low.” There are over 80,000 Jews in Las Vegas today—some say closer to 100,000—and only 22 synagogues. “Las Vegas seems to be the kind of place where people come to disappear, to blend into the masses,” says Amy Henry, the Outreach and Young Leadership Director at the Federation. “We’re spending an awful lot of time and resources and creative energy trying to find these people. We’ve been watching this community here for a number of years, and now we’re thinking, ‘Okay, we’ve got it down. We know how to get them in. We can take them to a bar at the Bellagio.’” So this year, the Federation is upping the ante—building community through Kosher Poker, a Texas Hold’Em tournament at the Sunset Station Casino. Henry anticipates an influx of hundreds of Jewish gamblers from across the country. “There are a lot of young people who want to meet and mix,” she says, “who know in their hearts that they want to be with Jews, but who don’t want people to talk to them about religion. That’s the beauty of kosher poker – we reach them where they are. It’s very non-threatening.” Sure, the Talmud has a thing or two to say on the subject of gambling, but in this case, the chips are really mitzvot—any profits that don’t go to the winner become donations to the Federation. And, of course, there will be drinks. “I think there’s been an ambivalence towards alcohol in the Jewish tradition,” said Rabbi Akselrad. “I guess it’s working to a certain extent, bringing young people together, but I wish there was another way to do it. I have a very popular Sabbath service where I give away free ice cream on a Friday night. Do people come because I give them free ice cream? That’s just the way it is. That’s the nature of the beast.” Whether or not Sin City Semites can be convinced to chase Friday nights on the Strip with Saturday mornings in shul remains to be seen. Either way, there’s always organized crime to keep Las Vegas’ chosen from going straight-edge: Las Vegas Sun columnist Jeff German recently noted that the Jerusalem Network is as violent as the mafia and “more than willing to keep the party going.” From the looks of things, the party’s just begun. – Abigail Goldman Schmear Campaign The JDO Protects Our Pickles On a recent gray Sunday afternoon, police cars and light-blue barricades surrounded an apartment building on West 72nd Street in New York City, next to Dougie’s Kosher Restaurant and across the street from a Judaica shop. The cops were bracing for a crowd, but by 2pm – the rally’s stated starting time – only around fifteen protesters had shown up. No matter. Mordechai Levy and his followers, the JDO – Jewish Defense Organization – were prepared to lead a vigorous rally all the same. The JDO, a faction that defected from the Jewish Defense League, is a modern-day heir to the politics and theories of Vladimir Jabotinsky. They believe that anti-Semitism is a grave threat in America and that Jews should bear arms and learn how to use them. That day’s rally was convened to demand the eviction of Michael Santamauro, a tenant on the seventeenth floor of the building outside of which they were protesting. Santamauro runs a New York apartment-hunting web site, and, according to the JDO and to several of his neighbors, is also active in Holocaust denial circles. He runs a neo-Nazi web site and has organizing speaking events for British Holocaust denier David Irving. “Evict the Nazi now!” yelled Levy over a megaphone. His followers repeated the call as a half-dozen police officers and several members of the press looked on. “This Nazi pig is a troublemaker!” Levy admitted that it would be illegal for Santamauro’s landlord to evict him based on political activities. But, he explained, Santamauro illegally runs a business – the apartment-hunting web site – from his home. “If it’s proven that he’s running a commercial enterprise out of a residence,” Levy insisted, “he can be thrown out like you throw out the garbage once a week!” Considering further, he added, “or twice a week.” The protesters bore handmade signs that read “Evict the Nazi Now!” and “Hitler is Dead but Schmutz Neo-Nazis Live On.” An elderly female protester with large glasses broke open a bag of candy corn as her neighbor remarked, “They have some nerve coming to the Upper West Side.” A middle-aged man, whose sign featured the slogan “Anti-Semitism is Terrorism” scrawled in marker on the back of a New Balance shoebox, announced, “This building is a terrorist zone! It is the reincarnation of Hitler!” “You’re a terrorist!” said an onlooker. After some heated debate on this point, the pedestrian moved on, and the protester turned to his companions in outrage. “That guy called me a terrorist!” he said. “I’m not a terrorist. I don’t ride on a camel.” That wasn’t the only opposition the JDO faced. A red-faced neighbor arriving on the scene accused the protesters of being as intolerant as the man whose eviction they sought. “He’s disgusting and you’re disgusting too!” she exclaimed, as the crowd tried to quiet her. “Why don’t you go after the Communists and the Socialists? They’re the ones who sold the chemical and nuclear weapons to the terrorists.” Her T-shirt bore a crossed-out image of Che Guevara. Most members of the crowd weren’t JDO regulars, but neighbors that Levy had recruited through an aggressive flyering campaign. One woman, who lived down the block from Santamauro, confessed that she was not active around the issue of anti-Semitism and did not usually attend rallies. “I’m just very anti-Nazi,” she said. “You can quote me on that.” Levy’s guest speakers included a faculty rabbi from Yeshiva University and Gail Brewer, a local city councilwoman. “I usually don’t invite politicians,” said Levy, explaining that he did not feel it was safe for Jews to trust elected officials. But Ms. Brewer represented the community, so he made an exception. A large man in fleece, trundling by with a tiny dog in tow, got wind of what was happening. “In a Jewish neighborhood?” he grumbled. “They never go away, do they?” Providing what Levy referred to as “security” were two high school students who had summered at Camp Jabotinsky, Levy’s Catskills retreat. There, Jewish teens learn about anti-Semitism and train in self-defense. One of the security boys demonstrated a trick he’d recently mastered: how to, when confronted with a knife at his neck, insinuate his hand between the blade and his jugular. “It’s better to get your fingers than your throat cut,” he explained. The boys said they were pleased to have been invited to the rally. Santamauro himself was nowhere to be found, and by 3pm the protest had drawn to a close. The police stacked the barricades for removal and the reporters drifted off. A week later, though, New Voices received a call from Levy: Santamauro’s neo-Nazi web site, he said proudly, was down for good. The JDO had prevailed again. But for Levy, the good fight is never done. -Miriam Felton-Dansky I Want MY JTV Maccabee Media Monster Mash Cable television had better watch its back. The coveted 18-49 demographic has a new network suitor – one with the power of the Torah fueling its charge. JTV, the soon-to-be-launched, first-ever Jewish television network, founded by John Odoner, will lure in its viewers with a wide range of offerings that includes news, comedy, reality shows, business, sports, movies, music, religion, health, and Hollywood, as reported in WorldNet Daily. And JTV’s not your bubbie’s Jewish network, either: programs will reportedly include “Two Jews, Three Opinions,” a political debate show; “Jewishly Incorrect,” comic current-events commentary; “Nice Jewish Boyz,” featuring scantily-clad Jewish women; and televangelism led by hip, Gen-X rabbis. Though he admits that some of his donors are conservative in outlook, Odoner – a real estate lawyer from New York – insists that JTV will “exemplify political and intellectual diversity.” He does plan to be “serious” with regard to issues like terrorism and Israeli security, but Odoner explains that the network will be strictly non-partisan: “On domestic issues," he says, "JTV is not going right-wing." Why launch JTV at all? Haven’t Jews been happily wandering the cable-TV desert for decades? And besides, aren’t we the people of the book? Odoner sees a vast untapped market in the Jewish couch potato. This vision should prove an asset in his efforts to woo advertisers – a must-have for JTV’s successful debut. According to Odoner, launching a network can easily run up a $50 million tab. But Odoner’s not just trying generate some green. To his mind, the channel will provide an important resource for Jews concerned about current events, particularly in the Middle East, and he plans to run several hours of direct-feed Israeli news programming daily. While the programming will naturally have a naturally Jewish perspective, JTV will seek to appeal to Americans of all religious stripes. But brace yourselves, remote-holders. JTV had better watch out, because no longer is it the only Jewish network on the block. Another is close behind it, and with both networks competing to launch as soon as possible, we may well witness a clash between the two media outlets that makes the Manishewitz-Carmel rivalry look like a water pistol fight. That’s right, “Shalom TV,” a cable network conceived by Bradford Hammer of Harmony, Pennsylvania, is in development. According to the Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles, “Shalom” just may be getting ready to explode onto the scene. Hammer’s lineup will feature such dernier cri programming as “Synagogue Tours,” in which rabbis lead the viewers in on-screen tours of their shuls; “Jewish Library,” which will explore the world of Jewish books, and “Our People,” to consist of interviews with Jewish leaders. But Odoner’s not worried – after all, he has the mighty legacy of centuries of Jewish oppression and ultimate success behind him. He’s convinced that JTV will not only succeed, but come out on top: “As Jews have a place among the nations,” he says, “we have a place among the networks.” - Liz Orenstein
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