Comments on: Do Orthodox Women Hate Women? [Modern Unorthodox]

By: Lacey

Lacey — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 07:55:10 +0000

David, you write “so many modern feminists (or modern women who call themselves feminists) use their power to belittle women who choose lives outside of the workplace or those who are “feminine” that the word has taken on a negative connotation.”

It would really help if you provided some names and examples. I am a feminist, have been one all my life, and I’ve never met a feminist who does this. This is actually a stereotype men have been leveling against feminists since the beginning of the feminist movement, back in the 1800′s.

By: David

David — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 00:33:53 +0000

First, to those who don’t understand why the author wants to separate herself from the feminist movement, I can provide some reasons (though they may not be the author’s of course, unless she responds here). Feminism at different places and different times may have been about parity, but so many modern feminists (or modern women who call themselves feminists) use their power to belittle women who choose lives outside of the workplace or those who are “feminine” that the word has taken on a negative connotation. That doesn’t mean you’ll find it in the dictionary, but it’s what a lot of men and women feel, which is more important than the dictionary because language is really defined by its users. Even the defenses of the word “feminism” above impliedly recognize that people use the word to mean something other than wanting men and women to be treated equally. Nobody said, “Simi, I’ve never heard that definition of feminism before – how are you using it?”

On to more important matters. Ms. Lampert, I am equally horrified by your classmate. And do think it’s pretty cool when the victim of abuse kills the abuser. I’m a prosecutor and I had a case where the wife hit her husband on the head with weights. I’m sure it would have been fantastic had he fought back instead of lamely going to the hospital, talking to the police, and then reluctantly testifying because he didn’t want his kids to lose their mom. But I digress. Asking what it’s like to be the wife of a world leader is a totally legitimate topic. First of all, there do happen to be more men than women in leadership positions, and this is even more true in the Orthodox world, but it’s just as legitimate to ask what it’s like to be the husband of a world leader. But YOU ARE IN AN ALL GIRL’S SCHOOL. And the topic was BEING A RABBI’S WIFE. They may try to dress the rabbi up and call him a world leader, but he’s a rabbi. And you are still part of a religion that does not believe that rabbi is a role for women, yael and d’vora aside, just like kohen isn’t a role for levi. Offensive would have been – what’s it like to be the wife of a lawyer or the wife of a doctor or the wife of a nurse (I know a few of those). This has nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with Orthodox culture and pretending rabbis are world leaders. The first is positive or neutral if you believe in Orthodox Judaism and the second is vapid marketing. Can’t you find the positive in that an all girl’s school under Orthodox Jewish auspices is teaching literature like the werewolf story and not that some of the girls were raised retarded (no offense to the developmentally disabled who generally have a pretty good moral compass) either by their parents or their teenage peers? I know that positive doesn’t sell papers, but find another topic rather than make one up (or bring better examples to support your thesis that Stern girls are largely sexist against women – I’m sure they exist).

By the way hoe is the Lubavitcher Rebbe’s wife going to give a speech when she died in 1988?

By: Farrar

Farrar — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 22:45:41 +0000

Sorry, and by room enough for everyone. I meant what will work as feminism in one community will not be the same in another. The biggest examples is usually Western feminism versus Eastern feminism. I see different feminism in the disablited community then I see in the abled community, etc. etc. I think every person, and every community has their own type of feminism. And that’s just how it has to and should be – cause we’re all different and we all see the world different ways. Just my two cents.

By: Farrar

Farrar — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 22:41:58 +0000

Our professors always stressed that it was not “feminism” but “feminisms.” Room enough for everyone. Also, less important but the bra burning thing is pretty much a myth

By: Deborah

Deborah — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 22:17:22 +0000

Don’t be afraid of the “F” word! Everything you say you believe in makes you a feminist. Including being feminine enough to put the Stepford Wives to shame.
There is a big fear or at least distaste for being a feminist today, I’m not sure why. It’s not the Seventies, you don’t need to burn your bra. Just keep questioning and speaking out. Good for you!

By: Shani Chabansky

Shani Chabansky — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 21:38:40 +0000

Simi,

Rad article. And don’t fool yourself, you are a raging feminist. And that’s awesome.

Have you read this book? http://www.amazon.com/Mind-Body-Problem-Contemporary-American-Fiction/dp/0140172459 If you haven’t, go read it. And 36 Arguments for the Existence of God. In fact, read everything by Rebecca Goldstein.

And while you’re at it, go visit this blog: http://finallyfeminism101.wordpress.com/. It’s got a couple of useful tools.

-Shani

By: Deb F

Deb F — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 21:31:20 +0000

You have the definition of a feminist wrong. If you believe in treating women fairly, you are a feminist. That’s it–it’s very simple. Anything else is incorrect.

Furthermore, you can be as feminine as you want, because that has NOTHING to do with being a feminist. The most macho man can be a feminist. And using the phrase “rabid feminist” and “raging feminist” as a disclaimer for yourself is incredibly demeaning to feminism as a whole, because it shows your misunderstanding of the very concept of feminism.

Please do some research on this. It is important to know what you represent.