Wow, My Life Makes a Good Comic

Since I’m the one who substitutes nonsense I draw for actual pictures, I thought I ought to use my last post for the semester to tell you that there is a method to the madness.

Inspired by the fact that every comic I’ve read has at least one Jewish character (although in one case it was a kid who dressed up as a Hasid for Halloween and told people to “put candy in his yarmulke”), I started to wonder what it would be like to draw out my own super-fascinating life. Actually, to my surprise, if I put in just a few lies, I could make a real story line.

1First, it will start out with why I left art school in Chicago to come back home. I found out I lived really close to a scary middle-aged man who wanted my phone number, I was fired from Ragstock, I was kicked out of my spider-infested studio apartment, and the time just seemed right to give up.

Next, I’ll have the story of how I moved home and met this lady who really loved Judaism and had Star of David tattoos and stuff, but then later I learned that she still also loved Jesus. She was pretty intense, saying all the time that “You’re the Chosen People, you know!” Then a variety of exhausting things happen, including my rabbi who, when I said I wanted to convert, said “To Judaism?”

(I’ll never forget that timeless line.)

2

I will have a couple of things that didn’t happen per se but would be interesting, like what would happen if the scary guy at the coffee shop told me he will convert to Judaism because “I make it sound so interesting” because he’s secretly in love with me even though he’s middle-aged just like the guy at the other coffee shop (which I think he actually is—in love with me, that is).

I think an important part to include will be my character briefly considering Christianity, which I haven’t, but every time I say something that might even imply I want to convert to Christianity, inevitably one of my Christian friends swoops in to try to be the one to convert me.

It’s really strange and it really needs to be in a comic.

3My character will thus briefly consider Christianity, find that it’s actually filled with weird subtle anti-semitic statements, like the time I was listening to some Christian preacher and he said how someplace in Romans it says that Jews are the dead limbs that can only be grafted back on the the tree if they believe in Jesus. Things like that. Defensive, my character will see that there’s no turning back, but at what cost? And what’s ahead?

I originally had the idea to make a sort of educational comic, and I think I will probably come up with some element of that. Like how to say “scary old man” in Hebrew.

My friend from the Reform temple came to visit my synagogue, and we agreed that the generation gap (i.e. there’s no one there between the ages of twelve and, like, forty) is really strange and uncalled for. 4I’m not sure exactly why there’s a generation gap, but I hope to fill it with things that aren’t just on the internet, you know?

“You mean like with comics?” Yeah, like with comics.

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