The Conspiracy

What’s my name again?

Hebrew Names

Two years ago, an Egyptian student in my history of the modern middle east class referred to Jewish culture as stolen culture, the Mizrahis eat Arab food and the Ashkenazis eat schnitzel so, he concluded, basically Israel was a country of stolen identities. I’m usually pretty peacenik/organic-granola-and-free-lovin but for some reason that statement gave me the impulse to grab him by the jugular and see what he’d look like as a bobble head. At the time I was going by another name. One that told everyone what side I spoke from during these verbal classroom scuffles.

In Israel I had unpacked the name that I had been given in whispers but never called. My mother’s Hebrew name, Hadassah. The story of Queen Esther had always been my favorite as a child, the lone woman savior, the secret identity slipped into my back pocket. I was not the only one. In cities like Jerusalem, where flocks of Americans crowded inside the pubs and Aroma cafes, there were countless Shoshannas and Saras. All of us dusting the mothballs from our Biblical names, weak from lack of exercise, as if shaking the filmy neglect from our winter coats. Maybe we were hoping that these names would help us find belonging among the ancient cities and Hebrew signage. Maybe we were just bored.

When Purim rolls around every year I start to ponder the ways that these names influence Jewish students, still wrestling with our identities. I begin dragging my eyes from face to face, wondering if their other name would introduce me to a new side of them, one that isn’t fully explained by the applications of their facebook profiles. I can’t write about the significance of Hebrew names for American Jews, or any Jews for that matter. I am no longer young enough to know everything. But I did meet this one dude at UC Davis with a wicked Hebrew name. My friend introduced us: “You’re both Jewish!”
Then he asked me for my Hebrew name and rattled off his own:
Mendel Shmool ben Chaim ben Tzivia.
When I asked him the story of his Hebrew name this is what he said.

S: My mom and grandparents call me “shmooly” as an affectionate nickname. It’s a name that I’ve been called since I was a baby. Mendel was my great grandfather. Shmool was on the other side, so it kinda connects me to past generations. Almost like there are two different sides of me,
Its two sides of who I am.

Me: What is the first memory that comes to mind where
someone used your Jewish name?

S: My mom calling me shmooly today.
She was saying good luck for a final I took today… I don’t really think about being Jewish on a day-to-day basis but when I am in a Jewish setting I feel more at home.

If anyone else feels the urge to share their Hebrew name and their experiences with it then totally, that’s why the Lord invented comments. But from my brief Purim pondering the conclusion I’ve reached is that even with different foods and costumes, our names seem to share synonymous stories.

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One Older Response to “What’s my name again?”

  1. shaul
    March 12, 2011 at 3:40 pm #

    Esther also had a secret Hebrew name- Hadasah- but she kept it quite when it wasn’t “appropriate.” I think that’s the way a lot of us feel- I remember when I first came to israel I was so excited to be in a place where my hebrew name would be a familiar, easy to pronounce proper noun again! I remember a famous midrash that says that when we were in egypt- there were two things we didn’t change after 200 years of exile– our Hebrew Names and our way of dress… (i dont know if they had tzitzi and beards back then but … :)
    but it is a kind of engraved link back to our people and families having these names that our parents gave us before they even really knew us… something indelible, like a brit mila (where they call out the name)… I feel my hebrew names have really shed insight on my personal struggles too- they are like our zodiac signs- these personalities/ energies that we are called…

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